Water tastes of taps

It smells like burning soap

Michael and Matt are talking about going to Berlin…
Michael: “Jordan, have you been to Germany?”
Jordan: “Yeah, I don’t know where. I’ve been to Portugal though”

I had loads of biscuits at once and nearly died.
They were McVities Digestives if that makes any difference.

Look, if you’re gonna put something that small in a ring that big…

*Talking about how to spell Cupboard*
You’ve just got to put cup and board together

I had sneeze when I was getting my haircut and it got cut too short

Beer full of fridge

You know how they have a +1 on TV? They should have a -1

*Chris talking about his gecko being nocturnal*

If its your pet can’t you teach it not be nocturnal?