*Jordan insinuates Billie went on a cinema date*
Billie: My friend is gay Jordan
Jordan: Rotherham United have a goal keeper but the opposition still score

*Matt’s veggie protein graze box thing*
Matt: These are a bit healthy for you Jordan
Jordan: I like nuts me

“It is a good space film but it’s a terrible space film at the same time”

Matt: If all of your mates jumped off of a cliff, would you?
Jordan: Yeah probably

Matthew: If you stay up past 12 it’s tomorrow
Jordan: In your head it’s not though

Dan: I can’t bring my hamster in it will die.
Jordan: Get one of those box things that never loses its center of gravity.

Mark: How you getting on Jordan?
Jordan: I’m just thinking about portrait double sided business cards.

*Helen’s mug has a Hank from Finding Dory on it that disappears when you put a hot drink in it.*

Amy: Did you watch Hank disappear?
Jordan: WOAH, where did he go? Has he gone to the other side of the mug?

*Turns mug around to look at the back of the image while mug is still full of tea*

Smart water makes me smart.

*Christmas Party*
Matt: You should go and ask someone to jingle your bells, just make sure it’s not a lad haha.
Jordan: Either way I’m winning.