Supreme lettuce box.

*Billie kicks Jordan under table*
Billie: I didn’t know it was you Jordan.
Jordan: Well who did you think it was, The Ghost Of Christmas Eve?

I don’t mind some nuts me.

There’s no tea in team.

It’s gunna hit you like a sore thumb.

*Going on First Dates* Yeah but I’d be like ‘So are we bonking then or what.’

Jordan: I’ve got Freshers.
Billie: Jordan you’re too old for Freshers.
Jordan: I’ll give it a good shave Billie

Don’t fuck with a manz coffee in a morning

Matt: I can’t remember the last time I drank.
Jordan: Well that’s what happens when you drink.

*Harambe the Gorilla*
Jordan: How do they know it wasn’t going to eat the child?
Matt/Joe: Because it was sat right next to it doing nothing.
Jordan: Well yeah it would do if it was shot dead!